Do Men Fear the "Flanders" Effect?

What is the Temperature of Your Church? That was one of the many questions asked in the book, Why Men Hate Going To Church, by David Murrow. The book is a fascinating response to the real issue that is going on in our world. Men are staying away from the church more than ever before. Did you know that less than 40% of the average congregation are men? In fact, more than 25% of married women attend church without their husbands. According to Christianity Today, many non-Christian men may fear turning into Ned Flanders if they attend church. Who is Ned Flanders? Fans of “The Simpsons” know Ned as the boring, straight-laced fellow who’s doorbell chimes a hymn and whose afraid to let his kids play with dice in the Monopoly game. That depiction of the Christian man is not only ridiculous, but a turn-off to most men.
Biblical advice to the church in Titus 2:6-8 says, “ (the old men should) …encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness, and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned…” Murrow claims that many churches have gotten away from taking the temperature of the men and finding out where their thermostat is set, thus, making the church a place men fear. In other words, when you go to a movie, what kind of movie are you going to see? Honestly, guys know a “chick flick” from a “guy’s movie”. You can definitely tell a Hugh Grant movie from Clint Eastwood’s Dirty Harry can’t you? That is as simple as it gets. Some men hate going to “chick flicks” and some men hate going to church. Men want to be men and feel manly, even at church.
Most churches have more than one thermostat. Many women want their church thermostat set on comfort. That is where the church is decorated with all of the comforts of any self respecting females digs… flowers, plants, doilies, and of course peace. Rick Warren calls these churches “family reunion churches.” If you continue to move the thermostat further you find other settings men fear. Ceremony setting is one where the church’s purpose is to keep traditions just as they have been kept for years. There is a control setting that loves to heap guilt trips and power plays on both men and women and many men just can’t stand that. Similar are the last two thermostat settings of conformity and confrontation. Pressure is put on to make people conform to “the rules” of the church (the Pharisee would have loved that setting!) while confrontation settings turn up the heat so much that men run out wishing they could slug someone, including the Pastor from the harsh words dealt out each week.
So what is the solution since men and women are often as different as Mars and Venus. How can the thermostat be set to keep both genders happy in the same church? While it is not a simple answer, Murrow suggests this thesis… men want to be challenged. Challenging, not in a confrontational manner, but stressing the mission of reaching out to people in service and evangelism for the kingdom of God. It is challenging in caring for those who are needy in spirit and material, but it does not seek personal comfort alone. Such a church challenges from the pulpit in direct to the point teaching, yet it is the church attendees who challenge one another to live lives seeking maturity in Christ. As scripture says, men learn by example. The church must find ways to allow men to see into the lives of other men. That, according to Murrow, will lead men to spiritual maturity. So what is the temperature at your church? I pray that it is one of challenge for men and women.

Steve Harvey Introduces Jesus Christ...

Thanks to Carrie McCullough for this VIDEO... CLICK HERE.

BACK from DRIVE 09...

Here is a hillariously stupid video from Johnny and Chachi we saw at Drive 09, just for a laugh.

Talking to Ourselves?

I have a silly question. “Do you ever talk to yourself?” Of course you do… I think we all have those conversations in our brains. Now for my second question, “Who are you talking to?” Some people may say that they are just rambling to themselves. But if you think about it, maybe there is another answer.
Author John Eldredge tells the story of a Christmas tradition where his family goes into the woods to chop down their annual Christmas tree. It was the weekend after Thanksgiving and John, his wife Stasi, and their two boys scheduled their trip on that Friday. As the week unfolded, things were hectic and crazy, as we all know life can be, but the family was determined to go on Friday. But, John prayed about going. When he did, he said to himself, “we need to wait until next weekend.” Indeed, his wife heard the same thing when she prayed about it. But, they had plans the next weekend and getting the tree would really work best the way they had planned… so off they went! Did I mention that John and his family live in Colorado? That weekend as they headed into the woods, the snow came down in piles and the jeep slid off the road ending up in a ditch. What had been a fantastic family outing turned into an ordeal. After not one, but two flat tires, a dead battery, and 10 degree weather, the family got their Charlie Brown Christmas tree… all three feet of it. Why didn’t John and Stasi listen to God’s wise counsel? Simple, they like so many of us want to do things our own way.
In the Bible, the book of James 4:8 says, “Come near to God and God will come near to you” and the book of Isaiah 50:4 claims, “God wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being taught.” God really wants to have a conversation with us. Really. But while God wants to speak with us, we are not attuned to God’s voice. I believe that we can learn to hear God just like we learn to play an instrument. In fact, I think that more than we realize it, we are in constant communication with God.
One evening I was working with the teenagers at my church and I brought up the questions I posed earlier about talking to ourselves. One of the teenagers responded. As I looked at him, I could see the light bulb pop on. He said that just before he grabbed the biggest kid in school in a moment of after school horseplay, the thought burst into his mind….”don’t do it.” With a big grin and a large cast on his right arm he knew that the voice in his head wasn’t solely his own idea, but the voice of God trying to look out for him. We hear that voice from time to time but most of the time, we ignore it. Certainly, even the best listeners miss God’s voice from time to time, but if we ask questions of God, we may find surprising and real answers. “What are you saying?” That is a question that should constantly be on our minds.
So here is the challenge. For the next few weeks, every day take the time to ask God “What are you saying to me?” Take the time after to listen… as in be quiet. It may be done anywhere, just try it and let’s see what you hear. You may even think yourself nuts, but that’s okay we can all be nutty sometimes. I think that in a few weeks, if you practice this simple exercise, I believe you will find God in a closer way. My daughters are taking piano lessons. They have been at it for months. Do you think they play better now or when they started… exactly! You will get better at it, but it may at first seem like sour notes… but simply try it… talk to yourself… talk to God.

Do You Want to Know How to Beat Death?

Have you ever thought about what you want to have written on your tombstone? Some of the better epitaphs on tombstones are, “I told you I was sick!” “Here lies Lester Moore. Four slugs from a 44. No Les, no more.” Guess who’s this is, “My Jesus. Mercy.” – Al Capone.
I think most people avoid talking about death as much as possible. You have probably never been to a party where the subject was part of the conversations. In general, even at after funeral gatherings, people avoid talking about death. We, our society, works hard to avoid getting old. We take pills, vitamins, cosmetics and even cosmetic surgery, and everything that promises to help us look and feel younger. But the truth is, even with all of our efforts, death will certainly come for each of us.
While I am not a betting man, I would bet you that your church saw a marked increase in attendance on Easter Sunday. Just as it did at Christmas (We clergy call many of you folks who come on those two days, Poinsettias and Lilies). Christmas is of course a family time, you know “Chestnuts roasting on an open fire…” yuletide sort of thing. But Easter, I think there is something else that draws people to church. Aside from bunny rabbits, eggs, and new wardrobes, I think there is something in our DNA that wants to hear the story again and somewhere deep within us, we want to know how to beat death too. That’s the Easter story isn’t it. We never have a parking problem on Thursday or Good Friday, only on Easter morning. There is something about Jesus coming out of that tomb that people really long to know about.
I Corinthians 15:51-57 says, “…Let me tell you something wonderful, a mystery I'll probably never fully understand. We're not all going to die—but we are all going to be changed. You hear a blast to end all blasts from a trumpet, and in the time that you look up and blink your eyes—it's over. On signal from that trumpet from heaven, the dead will be up and out of their graves, beyond the reach of death, never to die again. At the same moment and in the same way, we'll all be changed. In the resurrection scheme of things, this has to happen: everything perishable taken off the shelves and replaced by the imperishable, this mortal replaced by the immortal. Then the saying will come true: Death swallowed by triumphant Life! Who got the last word, oh, Death? Oh, Death, who's afraid of you now? It was sin that made death so frightening and law-code guilt that gave sin its leverage, its destructive power. But now in a single victorious stroke of Life, all three—sin, guilt, death—are gone, the gift of our Master, Jesus Christ. Thank God!
The truth is, we cannot beat death, only God can. We can only have faith that we will be resurrected by our loving God. The great preacher Peter Marshall once told this story about death and I think it is the best I have heard. “There was a boy who was dying of a terminal illness. His mother read to him daily and cared for him. He realized that he was not like other kids and over time began to know that he was going to die. One day he asked his mother, “What is it like to die? Will it hurt?” She welled up and had to leave the room. She prayed for an adequate answer and God gave it to her. She came back to her son and said, “When you were very small, you would play until you were exhausted and collapse on my bed. When you awoke the next morning, you were in your own bed with your pajamas on. Your father had scooped you up and taken you to your own room and own bed. That is what death is like. You go to sleep and you Father in heaven will pick you up and lovingly care for you and place you in your own room in your own bed.” The boy understood and was at peace with the answer. A few weeks later, the boy died and indeed, he was lifted up out of his death bed and placed in his own room in heaven.” Indeed, God has a place for you in heaven. John 14 tells us this truth as well. “Trust me. There is plenty of room for you in my Father's home. If that weren't so, would I have told you that I'm on my way to get a room ready for you? And if I'm on my way to get your room ready, I'll come back and get you so you can live where I live.” Maybe you can write on your tombstone, “I’m not here, this grave is empty and my room in heaven is now taken.”

IT IS Never OVER!!

Last Sunday, Easter, we showed this clip with a message that "It's Not Over!" 

Do you feel defeated?  Do you feel beaten?  Then this message is one of victory.

Enjoy.

click here for the video

Wake Up, There’s A War Going On Here!

Wake-up… wake-up! The voice roused me from my sleep and I felt a tug on my shirt to get up and get going. It was my brother-in-law getting me out of my warm bed to pile into the station wagon for the long trip to Duke Medical Center. I was ten years old and my mother had what would be terminal cancer. This particular night was not totally uncommon, just too common. She was in such pain that she couldn’t stand it anymore and had called my sister and her husband to come help her. For years I didn’t understand why my mother had to deal with cancer. Why I had to live without her. If God is loving, then why is life sometimes so unloving? The answer, while not simple, can be partly found in a biblical truth that many Christians miss because they are snoozing like I was that night.
The fact is… we live in a world that is at war. What… you thought life should be full of peace? The world in which you and I inhabit is one that by its very nature is at war. There is a raging battle between the forces of God and the forces of Satan. The battle has been going on since the Garden of Eden and rages on today. While the victory was won on the cross of Calvary, Satan refuses to go quietly into the night. He is determined to battle on, thus, we must face his wrath in our lives.
So why fight, I did say that Jesus won on Calvary. You don’t have to fight. Indeed, you do have choices, God is not one of forced labor. But, when people don’t battle evil, they suffer for it. In Deuteronomy 1:26-41, the Israelites are punished for 40 years for refusing to fight the Amorites. It is not suffering because of God, it is suffering which is self inflicted because evil is allowed to get a foothold. Ephesians 6 says it very clearly, “God is strong, and he wants you strong. So take everything the Master has set out for you, well-made weapons of the best materials. And put them to use so you will be able to stand up to everything the Devil throws your way. This is no afternoon athletic contest that we'll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels. Be prepared. You're up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it's all over but the shouting you'll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You'll need them throughout your life.”(The Message)
So wake-up. Sleeper arise, wipe your eyes and do not be in denial! If you don’t believe me, how about C.S. Lewis who says in his book, Mere Christianity, “One of the things that surprised me when I first read the New Testament seriously was that it talked so much about a Dark Power in the universe—a mighty evil spirit who was held to be the Power behind death, disease, and sin . . . Christianity thinks this Dark Power was created by God, and was good when he was created, and went wrong. Christianity agrees . . . this is a universe at war.” Indeed, a war of the spiritual realms and the fleshly realms. Author John Eldredge puts it this way, “I am staggered by the level of naïveté that most people live with regarding evil. They don’t take it seriously. They don’t live as though the Story has a Villain. Not the devil prancing about in red tights, carrying a pitchfork, but the incarnation of the very worst of every enemy you’ve met in every other story. Dear God—the Holocaust, child prostitution, terrorist bombings, genocidal governments. What is it going to take for us to take evil seriously? Now back to my story. God is loving, pain ends and eternal life is given. I know my mother’s faith and I know her place in God’s loving arms although I still grieve for myself. Unfortunately, we live in a war torn world. Bad things do happen. Disease, violence, poverty, war, corruption and all those hideous things are not the product of our good God, but a symptom of a world that has fallen from the presence of sin and forces opposed to God. This Easter, know that the victory is won, but don’t forget what led to the tomb: a trial, a beating beyond belief, and inhumane torture at the hands of those influenced by Satan. You have an enemy. Now wake-up and let's go, war is at hand.

What Happened To The American Dream

What’s going on in our world? Every day things seem to be getting worse. People are losing their jobs, the stock market is down, the banks are teetering on collapse, and it seems that things are simply spiraling downward. Someone even recently told me that the end of the world is coming soon. I asked, “How do you know?” She said, “Look at all the horrible things happening in our world.” I certainly see her point. What’s worse is that it seems to be a rigged game. You know a con game like “Three card Monte”. It seems to me that the people or agencies that our country has long entrusted as keeping society safe have failed us. Crime is rampant. Oh, I’m not talking about “old fashioned” crime of break-ins, theft, even violence, although we have plenty of that. I’m talking about the criminals who have robbed our retirement accounts, savings, and allowed systems to enable unscrupulous people to profit from it all. Much of this “white collar” crime is to blame for our country’s economic and social problems, even the world’s problems. It seems that the world has become more and more Darwinian, survival of the fittest. The Golden Rule seems to be “he who has the gold rules!” And the question is what can we do about it?

Conventional wisdom seems to be at a loss here. I have listened to smart people debate the issues that are in front of us. Little has changed. Maybe we must begin to acknowledge that our problems are not new. I am not a prophet of gloom and doom. I am a realist who

looks at the world my children and grandchildren will inherit and I wonder what it will be like for them. History tells us that ancient Rome fell and many, many other empires have come and gone. If we are going to continue, things must change and change soon.

Our society has to begin to realize that people matter, especially the common person. Jesus tells the story of the widow who gave her last two coins to the church in Luke 21. Jesus’ point is not that the poor widow has given all that she had, the point of the story is… SHE SHOULDN’T HAVE BEEN OUT OF MONEY. Those who had wealth should have cared for her. This is not welfare, but true benevolence to someone who was in need. It was more important to take care of the widow than to show off their wealth. All of the people whom Jesus is speaking to think they are “good people”. They have forgotten to be sure that the widow has not only enough to put in an offering to God, but she should not be down to her last coins in the first place. Most folks want the basics of a good life. Most folks are willing to work for those benefits. But our government has to ensure that the system is at least fair. Isn’t that what we want a fair system where we can make the best of our opportunities? We may not strike it rich, but we want a chance to prosper and rear our families.

How warped has our society become? I have a friend who worked for an NFL football team. Last Monday he got laid off as a “cost cutting move”. Meanwhile the team negotiated a 40 million dollar deal with an offensive lineman. Yep, they needed his meager salary and

took the chance that such a move might ruin his family. Ironically, the team sought him out to hire him because of his skill. He just happened to be the last hired in his department, it had nothing to do with his performance at all. That’s just business. I wonder what Jesus would say about that?

Will the world end soon as my friend said? I don’t know, but I do know that our society must wake up and begin to look out for its most precious resources, people and prayer. I hear the words of Maximus from the movie Gladiator… “There was once a dream that was Rome, it shall be realized.” Maybe we can recover the dream that once was America. God help us.

Two Bowls, Two Champions

Football season has come to an end and so I and many of you have an empty place within us until next fall when they tee the ol’ pigskin up again. But before we say adieu, I want to revisit the two championship games from both college and the NFL.

First let’s look at the final college game. It was the University of Florida against Oklahoma University. One of the participants was the Florida was quarterback Tim Tebow. Tim is a young man with a great deal of talent. But that’s not why I am writing about him. Talent in college football is everywhere. In a game like that, talent is shared by all. It’s not a case of who has any, only a case of how much each has. The Sooners had their own star quarterback (and Heisman Trophy winner) Sam Bradford. But Tebow stands out, not because he won the Heisman the year prior, but because of his clear and bold statements about his Christian faith. Tim is even bold enough to sport scripture on the black patches under his eyes that he wears during games. Tebow says this about his faith, “If people don’t believe it, that’s fine. There’s always going to be nay-sayers, people that are going to say it’s fake. But that’s fine, because you can’t control everybody. But I can control what I do, my attitude, how I approach the situation. How I approach the situation is I want to do everything in my power that football gives me to influence as many people as I can for the good, because that’s going to mean so much more when it’s all said and done than just playing football and winning championships.” Before last season began, Florida coach Urban Meyer was asked about his star. Meyer responded not about football, but about how Tebow has inspired the Coach to go with his own family on a mission trip to the Dominican Republic. “Tim has done a lot of things that opened my eyes, and that’s one of them,” Meyer said. “To have our children experience that, with three other families, it was a life-changing experience.” What a witness for Christ!

The second player I want to highlight is none other than Kurt Warner, the star quarterback from the upstart Arizona Cardinals. The Cardinals were in the Super Bowl for the first time ever. But Warner had been to the big game twice before with the St. Louis Rams. He had won one and lost one. He is a guy who, after spending some time stocking grocery shelves, caught on with the Rams as a back up quarterback in 1999. When the Rams needed him, he stepped in and delivered. But, like so many other players in the NFL, his talent got him recognized, but his faith in God and willingness to speak about his faith has set him apart. Warner said, "If you ever really want to do a story about who I am, God's got to be at the center of it. Every time I hear a piece or read a story that doesn't have that, they're missing the whole lesson of who I am." In Warner’s own words, his faith defines him. No the Cardinals did not win, but that fact is irrelevant, Warner, Tebow, and anyone, including you, who witnesses about God’s love, mercy, and grace is and always will be… CHAMPIONS!

We look into the book of Acts to explain such zealous behavior by these two men. Acts 1:8 reports that Jesus promises, “… you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be My witnesses both in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and even to the remotest part of the earth.” Be bold and brave! May the Holy Spirit’s power descend upon all Christians who read this message so that we too may claim the mantle of champion witnesses.

Hail to the Chief

It has been an exciting week in our nation. Our country is living new history
in electing Barack Obama as the 44th President of the United States. For those who voted for him and those who did not, he is the President… period. For the Democrats and the Republicans, he is the President… period. For the Christian, Muslim, Jew, Hindu, Buddhist, etc… even the Atheist, he is the President… period.
Scripture tells us how we are to respond to our new President. Romans 13:1-7 makes this bold statement, “Be a good citizen. All governments are under God. Insofar as there is peace and order, it's God's order. So live responsibly as a citizen. If you're irresponsible to the state, then you're irresponsible with God, and God will hold you responsible. Duly constituted authorities are only a threat if you're trying to get by with something. Decent citizens should have nothing to fear. Do you want to be on good terms with the government? Be a responsible citizen and you'll get on just fine, the government working to your advantage. But if you're breaking the rules right and left, watch out. The police aren't there just to be admired in their uniforms. God also has an interest in keeping order, and He uses them to do it. That's why you must live responsibly—not just to avoid punishment but also because it's the right way to live. That's also why you pay taxes—so that an orderly way of life can be maintained. Fulfill your obligations as a citizen. Pay your taxes, pay your bills, and respect your leaders.”
The apostle Paul wrote this to the Roman church in an era when the Emperor Nero was on the throne. Nero was a horror of an authority. He was the one who blamed the Christians for everything that went wrong and began a brutal era of killing Christians for sport and pleasure. Could the people respect him? Maybe not much, but Paul advises Christians to live in their society within the bounds of rule, order, and government. Today we can hear these words again afresh. I prayed for President Obama on election- day for his safety. I pray that his policies will be benevolent and for the best possibilities for his Presidency. I pray that our country will come together in reaching agreements that will be sound in judgment and prudent for future generations. Our economy is a wreck and there are those who need to be brought to justice for some of the crimes committed.
Ultimately though, there is free will. Free will allowed Nero to behave like a mad man. Free will enabled someone like Adolf Hitler to terrorize the world. But, free will brought Emperor Constantine to proclaim Christianity the religion of much of the known world. Free will enabled so many great leaders to choose to be the difference maker in helping the citizens each represented. You and I will continue to pay our taxes, obey the laws, and be respectful of our elected and appointed officials. But at the same time, I encourage you to be in prayer for President Obama, our legislators, and our judicial officials. May they use their will and authority to bring this country into line with what God wants for His people. Until next time, Blessings!