An Honest Conversation

One evening I received a call from a friend who didn’t even say “Hello”; he simply asked “Do you know of anyone having an affair with Tiger Woods. At that point, it had become so comical because seemingly every other day another woman was coming forth and claiming a sexual relationship with the greatest golfer on the planet. How did you perceive Tiger Woods before all of the information about his multitude of liaisons became public knowledge? Honestly, I think most people really cheered for Tiger. His amazing abilities on the golf course created the idea that on any given occasion he might do something incredible… and often… he did. Like him or not, Tiger is still the best player on the planet. I suspect that his popularity will never be what it was, but most people will forgive or forget or not care or whatever and move on. The ironic twist is that this very, very, public figure is now seen in a far different light. That has happened before to people like baseball slugger Mark McGuire, former Presidents Bill Clinton and Richard Nixon, stock broker Bernie Madoff, O.J. Simpson, and too many politicians to list here.
One of the biggest falls was biblical. King David had it all. He had killed the giant, Goliath, overcome the armies of enemies, and even survived murderous attempts on his own life from his own king, Saul. There he was, reclining on his couch on a day when many were off at war. He saw the lovely Bathsheba and was smitten. Later when he found out she was pregnant, he tried to conceal his actions and even killed her husband in an all out effort to get away with his indiscretions. From that point onward, David was never the same. Israel was never the same. He acknowledged his sin and God forgave him but his legacy was forever tarnished.
What can we learn from the Bible and today’s headlines? First, we know that while God invented sex, God intended it to be a part of the marital relationship. There is a reason that the Bible uses the term “know” when it speaks of sex. “To know” someone is actually knowing a great deal about them. It is an intimate term that is much more than physical. When people fulfill only their physical desires, there is a loss of relationship. People become objects, ceasing to be human beings. It is easy to see how our culture, men in specific, struggles with seeing women (and men) as sexual objects. Sex is used to sell everything from soft drinks to pornography.
Secondly, God wants people to love one another, but, sorry, that doesn’t mean random acts of sex. Tiger Woods may have an addiction to sex, but his behavior may also destroy his marriage. He is not alone in our country. Are we shocked that the divorce rate continues to grow? God wants people to love one another as brothers and sisters, but husbands and wives are to love one another as partners, including sexual partners. The apostle Paul said this many times in letters to Ephesians, Colossians, I Peter, and Corinthians. Sex outside of marriage leaves its mark. Did you know that there are 12 million new cases of sexually transmitted diseases each year? Like a child trying to separate a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, there is always something remaining. The analogy may not be clear, but I think you get the point! Lives are damaged and emotions are never the same.
Finally, there is Good News. No matter who you are or what you have done, God loves you. Not because you love God, but simply because you belong to Him. You are forgiven. You can always turn around and realize that God will make you whole again. God will allow you to start fresh again. Male or female, we are free to recognize that we have done wrong and start over. I love that about God. Everyone is redeemed through grace, not because of how we act, but in spite of how we act. Sex is not dirty or wrong, but beautiful and fulfilling when used as God intended. I wrote this not for those who are in committed marriages and faithful, but on the chance that it may help someone who isn’t because the church has to have an honest conversation and teach sex education.